Monday, October 02, 2006

The Monster Called PMS

I'm going through my worst PMS to date.

I never used to have PMS, not until I turned 23 anyway.

Before that, I've always thought that PMS is just an excuse for girls to be moody and throw tantrums. *I'm sensing some very angry stares* Back in high school, I even lectured Bridget to take responsibility for her own emotions and not blame it on hormones. Well, look who's talking now? -_-

Someone in my class did her final year thesis on treatments for PMS. Apparently, in some really bad cases, women have to go on antidepressants just to battle the monster. It's really not just in our heads, but a medical condition.

So if you're thinking we're just a bunch of crazy biatches finding excuses for our bad temper, you can't be further from the truth. You should be in our shoes and see if you like it.

I once told Bee that sometimes I feel like we're all just walking test tubes. What we do and what we feel are all controlled by chemical reactions in our body. It's scary what chemical imbalances and hormonal changes can do to us.

We get teary for no reason at all. We can't control the anger that's eating our senses away. At times we feel so lonely that we just wanna break down and cry. No matter what you do, we don't feel loved at all. And we're extra sensitive towards what you say to us.

The worst part is, we can't help it!

This time round, it got even worse for me. I felt so depressed that nothing could excite me at all. I just wanted to lie in bed all day long and not do anything. I hid in my room and cried. I felt like nothing is ever gonna go right in my life.

I didn't feel like talking to anyone, so I shut everyone out, including Bee. Now that's a first. In the past, no matter how bad I felt about things, I had never asked Bee not to call me. But this time round, all the negativity was just too overwhelming, to the point that I wanted to give up on everything.

I hate to say this, but being a girl really sux sometimes!

(Of course, being the girl's boyfriend sux a little too.)

2 left a petal:

Minny said...

Hope you're feeling better now. Maybe plan your diary to do fun/uplifting things during that time of the month. I think certain diets can also help.

MisSmall said...

Minny: Thanks! I am feeling much better already. It's a good thing that the monster only visits once a month huh? *Touches wood*